on jealousy

Its beady eyes snicker in the dark. It takes its cane and heaves it deep through the pulp, jeering with contempt. The scar will fester and gracelessly leak out its soupy offspring. It will inflict the whole, it will transcend the whole, it will affect its everything. It muffles a sigh of projected bliss in order to concentrate better on the job itself, thrusting the wicker deeper into the soft tissue.

Jealousy takes one by surprise, perfidiously lurking along the train of thought, it suddenly lurches and fiercely takes one over. It is the purest synthesis of absurdly oxymoronic emotions that chemically fuse in one’s brain, through which they apocalyptically work their way like sulfuric acid. The gist of the irony is that these feelings and emotions have an intrinsic way of creeping through the corridors of neural connections that keeps them in the shade until one finds oneself being nudged in the ribs, with a devious wink, by an embodiment of repression.

The world shifts forms and colours, at first confusingly swiftly, only to switch to a distortedly lagging mode in a matter of seconds. Nothing is like before, everything undergoes dramatic change. The lips mumble cryptic messages, the glances turn perverted, the hands writhe lustfully, reaching for conspiratorial touches. The passer-bys look meaner, the crows caw reproachfully, the omniscient voices around swirl into a maddening tornado. It all darkens and sinks into itself, ever filling its ever-growing hole.

It heaves the cane from the furrow and watches it fill with the scarlet secretion. It rubs its hands as it bites its lips with joy. It might as well get a chair, sit back and enjoy the show. Ah, right on time, blondie!

oras